My Child Accidentally Saw Me Having Sex, What Should I Do?

Getting caught up in the moment can also lead to an unsettling event. No matter how discreet parents are about their sex life, little eyes and ears sometimes see and hear things that they never intended. Getting caught in the act by a child can be emotionally and mentally embarrasing for a parent, but it does happen, leaving many mothers and fathers wondering how to approach the subject.

If your child walked in on an intimate moment, it’s important to deal with it. Although it may be much easier to ignore the incident altogether, it is your responsibility to provide your child with an explanation. However, what you say will depend on the age of the child. Giving a detailed explanation of the birds and the bees to a toddler is unnecessary. Let the age group be your guide.

For children age two and under, there will likely be no memory associated with the event. At this age, young toddlers do have the ability to retain information, but they are also easily distracted. If your child is very young and saw something that he or she shouldn’t have, there is no need to panic. Many parents will simply tell the child that mommy and daddy were hugging or wrestling, or no explanation may be needed at all. Don’t be afraid to give it some time, to see if the child brings it up again. Chances are, this will be the last time you hear about it.

Pre-school age can be a bit trickier. In this age group, children are too old to let it go, but they may not be ready for the full-blown details. The path you choose will depend on the maturity of your child. Some parents feel compelled to talk to their children about sex at a very young age, while others prefer to wait until later. Creativity is key; if you are comfortable stretching the truth to get through the day, go ahead and do so.

With older children, you’re faced with a tough decision. It’s not about your level of readiness, it’s about that of your child. Is your son or daughter ready to hear the facts, or should you wait a bit longer? Only you can answer that question. If your child has reached an age where you have no choice but to explain the situation, focus on love instead of sex. Explain that you and your partner love each other and that your actions were an expression of love. There’s no need to get technical. Stay within your comfort zone and keep your cool, and the day will pass before you know it.

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